Too much, too fast, too soon, too few

Not sure if I’m hitting burn out, or if I have just tapped my inner well dry and need to wait on it to recharge.  I am bulling through stories, but the spark refuses to ignite like it typically does when I sit down to write.  It reminds me so much of something one of my SCA brothers wrote:

Oh, how I wish I could find him singing this. I was surprised to find it published where I could actually copy it! I still feel like the student who has failed to learn properly, but just seeing the original words has made such a difference already. Now, to go see how much more I can get on paper before the euphoria of discovering a long lost friend fades!

No flame, no music fair, no song there is to sing.
No inspiration here yet to be found in me.
The student may have learned, but the teacher has not taught.
No spirit behind the words – poem, tune, and tale for naught.

Wand’ring here, the forest through, with the Winter all around,
I, a weary bard, sat to rest upon the ground.
Beneath the barren oak, ‘gainst its gnarled trunk I lay,
And as I sat, began to dream, all around began to fade.

The oak was full, lush and green, and soon music filled my ears,
Such beauty never known — my eyes, they filled with tears.
In the music I heard words, soon distinct and clear as day,
And as I sat there at the foot, this is what I heard them say.

CHORUS:

“Oh, come. Come to me. Come and eat of the fruit I bear.
I am the Poet’s Tree. Come and dream in the morning air.
Hush and listen to the Muse. Soon you’ll hear a song ensues.
But be careful what you choose to take away.”

‘Mid the branches and rustling leaves climbed down a maiden fair,
Her skin was pale as moonlight clear, and midnight shone within her hair.
With her hand extended me, she bad me welcome here,
And with a touch of that gentle hand, soon belayed all of my fears.

“Weary bard, you seek a song, then eat hear of this fruit.
This is the Poet’s Tree, who’s great and mighty root
Reaches deep into the earth to draw from inspiration pure
Flowing as a river wild to light a flame that shall endure.”

I took the fruit into my hands, wanting all I reached for more,
The juice was strong and bittersweet, and I drank as ne’er before.
The quenching thirst, it brought a flame, and now my soul within me burned
With stories, songs, and poems new, and still the words to me returned.

CHORUS

Lovers fair, and heroes brave, epic sagas and family lines
All of these I saw and heard in swirling colors and dancing rhymes.
Through my pen the Spirit flowed — songs of love and tales of pain.
Bereft of passion nevermore, still it came like gentle rain.

Soon the day turned into night, and then to day once more.
And though I wrote the whole night through, still it came as ancient lore.
No food or drink did I dare take, the days and nights they became as one.
The flame that warmed, it now consumed, and my work barely begun.

I wept for songs ne’er to be sung, and for tales that would never be,
In swirling tempests all around, then I woke beneath the tree.
It was Winter as before, but now my soul within me burned.
The songs and tales I’d learned were mine, and still the words to me returned:

CHORUS X 2

Antigonus Bearbait (Toby A. Pugh)

What sparked off this post was that for the last week I have been bulling through no more than one or two pages of progress on book two of my series.  Expecting to be able to accomplish MUCH more today, I sat down with high energy, and fell flat on my face.  Energy just drained away without one iota being added to the words already put down.  Feeling sorry for myself, I rummaged around in my head, trying to dig up any feeling of desire to continue.  Nothing, nada, zip.

But, the chorus of this poem/song came floating up out of the depths of my despondency.  In writing down what I could remember of this piece – I HAVE performed it once or twice – I got frustrated with missing stanzas, or lines I knew were not correct.  Then, I was able to find the original author of the piece, and then winkle out where he had hid it.  Oh, blissful day!  Now, things are turning the corner, and I might be able to finish out a chapter or two today after all!  I hope this inspires you as much as it does me.

I am just sorry there is no audio recording of Antigonus singing this.  It loses some of the impact when read or spoken, sad to say.  And, some of the phrases take on an entirely different connotation.  If anyone ever discovers a recording of this by the author, please let me know!  (And, take the time to listen, he is that good!)

Now, off to the races again.  Too many time commitments, moving too fast to really catch up to myself.  Too little time to sit around moping over nothing, and too few hours left between now and when I want the next book to come out to waste!  Hope you are having a wonderful day!

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6 thoughts on “Too much, too fast, too soon, too few

  1. Haha, I know that feeling. I’ve got my first three books finished, and am finally getting my wife to refine it, but this last book has been hard. I know what i want my characters to do, I even know how I want them to do it, but getting it from head to paper can be so frustrating!!!!

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    1. Very, very true. I have the entire SERIES mapped – the story gave me that much. Then, it up and walked out of the planning session on me. I’m still trying to figure out how to pace the next couple of books, so that things end when the series ends.

      Between writing, school, work, and homework, I keep looking at my “platter” and wondering who on earth I think I am. Superwoman, I am NOT. Sleep has to figure in there somewhere, I just can’t seem to figure out what that mythical state actually is any more.

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        1. Well, to be honest, I wasn’t planning on actually starting this project. It was a stupid question in a role play group that sparked off a smaller rendition of the first book. Then, about 2 months before school started, the writing bug bit. And, it still hasn’t let go. 1 book down, 1 book in the process, 3 to go – but mostly mapped. Going to be an interesting ride this semester, that’s for certain!

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          1. Awesome. Mine started as a group I was going to run with friends, but being 30, their kids and life caught up with them, so we don’t have hours to play : ( So instead, I just decided to write it all in a book.

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          2. ::Nods:: Yeah, I miss the RP as well. But, there is life, then there is Real Life. I may not like having to deal with RL, but at least right now, it pays the bills and leaves me a little time to write.

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